Blasted feelings...

I found my ex, Johnna on MySpace the other day, and today when I went to my home page, looking to see if there were any new comments or anything, I saw her picture on my "Top 8" friends list thing. And my eyes started to well up just a little. I'm fighting it right now cause Ben's right next to me, and I don't want him asking about it.

Dana asked me a few times if I still loved Johnna, and I told her no....and at the time I truly believed that I don't, but the more I see her picture, the more I realize that I am. Its hard being in love with someone who you know doesn't feel the same way. I know there's little to no hope of her and I getting back together, and that doesn't really alleviate things any. She was the first girl I truly felt that I loved, and I don't think i'll ever be over that, as much as i'd like to think I will be. She mentioned to me on AIM the other day that she's gotten to know someone down in Australia, and that she's gonna be heading out there on vacation. Whether or not it was specifically to see this person, or if she's just going because she's always wanted to, I have no idea...I didn't bother to ask. So yeah, that's what's going through my head at the moment...for some reason I just got the urge to write about it. Ja ne.

Currently listening to: Safe Passage by Manmade God