God, i'm so confused right now. The more I think about Dana, the more I miss her. The more I miss her, the more I want to forgive and forget and just get back with her. There's part of me that wants to, and there's part of me that doesn't. The part that does...I dunno, I can't tell if I really do want her back, or if i'm just saying I do so I won't feel lonely. When her and I were together, I was really happy...I loved being in a relationship with her, even though at times I felt like I was kinda giving in to what she wanted and not really thinking things through. The part that doesn't is just afraid i'm going to get hurt again like I did the last time, that she'll flip out and go do something that'll end up hurting me, or making things worse. I don't want to have to worry about her going out and doing what she did this time, every time we have a fight of some kind. It seemed like at the first sign of trouble she overreacted, and things got out of hand. I've already forgiven her for it, even though it hurt a lot to hear what happened. We talked last night for the first time since Sunday, and it didn't really feel like anything changed. I still care a great deal about her, and I don't think I ever will stop, especially since she's the first real girlfriend i've had.

I don't know what to do...we both made mistakes, and have apologized for them. I'd like to move on, but I really just don't have a clue where to go. If I should start dating other people, if I should just wait a few months, see how things go and re-evaluate our relationship or what. I hate it when there's just no clear cut answer to things, but that's how life is, eh?

Ja ne.