I Am What I Am, And That's All That I Am

2011-12-29T11:33:00.001-08:00

1) Portal 2I completely forgot this game actually came out in 2011. I loved the hell out of it, and I remember playing it for hours at a time, trying to beat it, and having a wonderful time. And then after that, staying up super late with my friend going through co-op together, and having a wonderful time. The characters, the story, the music, and the action all were incredible, and IMO there was

2011-11-21T13:29:00.001-08:00

If you've been a fan of even one or two Zelda games over the years, you owe it to yourself to play Skyward Sword. All in all it was an amazing experience, one i'm looking forward to repeating down the line. Some reviews have said the game is slow to start, and in my experience I didn't really feel that way. Maybe it's partly because I know what to expect in a Zelda game, which when I think about

2011-08-21T02:35:00.000-07:00

To quote The White Stripes, I just don't know what to do with myself. I haven't been in very many relationships in my life. So it's safe to say when it comes to relationships, i'm still pretty much a virgin, for lack of a better term. With each relationship, i've learned something else about myself, and about how they work, but overall i'm clueless. I'm not proud to admit this, but i'd rather be

2011-07-25T23:59:00.000-07:00

I am so sick and tired of my worrying brain. Yet again i'm sitting here alone questioning every little detail of the other night, wondering if I did anything wrong or did anything to possibly upset someone. 99% of the time I don't have anything to worry about, but there's just some part of my mind that constantly worries. I can't shut it off, I wish I knew how, because it does nothing but depress

2011-05-19T22:09:00.001-07:00

Way too many people are far too caught up on looks to ever get to know someone. I experience this on a daily basis, and am most definitely guilty of it myself from time to time. It's become more apparent to me now that i'm single again. The people I contact to try and hook up are perfectly willing to talk to me until I send a picture, and then they shut up. I know i'm not the best looking guy in

2011-04-26T10:16:00.000-07:00

I just had the weirdest dream, or set of dreams really, i'm not sure which. Now, in this dream I had last night, I remembered having a dream previously about Maynard James Keenan from Tool talking about the forming of the universe. I can't remember if it was in the format of a Tool song, or if I was just dreaming he was telling me face to face about it, I'm not really sure. But in this latest

2011-04-05T22:18:00.000-07:00

The song is "Make It Stop (September's Children) by Rise Against. I love the message in this song, even though the song itself isn't my favorite.Bang bang go the coffin nails Like a breath exhaled Then gone forever It seems just like yesterday How did I miss the red flags raise? Think back to the days we laughed We braved these bitter storms together Brought to his knees he cried But on his feet

2011-03-21T13:33:00.000-07:00

If you've known me for a long time, you most likely know i'm not the most secure person in the world. All my life i've been pretty insecure, and it's only in the last ten years or so that i've started to come out of that. Around my friends I haven't changed much, but i've become much more open since I became a FedEx driver. I can't really say why that's helped, but it has.So, even though overall

2010-08-12T12:10:00.000-07:00

What is it about me that ruins possible relationships? The last two people i've met that have shown an interest in me, i've bugged far too constantly and scared off. I don't know what the hell causes me to be so annoying, but I can't seem to help myself. Am I just so desperate to be in a relationship I destroy any chances I have with anyone I meet by being too eager? What is it in me that causes

2010-05-02T18:27:00.001-07:00

What i'm about to say might not come to much of a surprise to anyone who really knows me, or anyone who has read this blog in the past, but with all the new friends i've made recently, plus all the old friends i've rediscovered through Facebook, Twitter, and other means, I figure it's time to “re-announce” it.I am bisexual.I've pretty much known this for years, and only recently wanted to admit

2010-01-05T22:58:00.001-08:00

I haven't really updated my blog in a long time, as i'm sure people have noticed. Can't really say why, guess I got out of my writing phase for a little while. Who knows.I know it's already a few days into 2010, but seeing as how I haven't really written anything in this for all of 2009, I figure i'm still okay. Anyway, i'm so very, very glad that 2009 is over. There have been a few highlights

2008-10-04T17:47:00.001-07:00

Let me preface this post by first saying that when it comes to politics, I know damn near next to nothing. What little I do know comes from the Daily Show, so obviously i'm going to be slightly slanted in my view, but it's my limited view, and I do the best I can with it. But please, if you feel i'm wrong or uninformed, don't hesitate to let me know, but I beg of you to do it in a polite fashion.

2008-07-12T02:24:00.001-07:00

As of last Sunday, i've made the conscious decision to try to, as the subject says, broaden my horizons. I'm trying to put myself into new situations, because as far as i'm concerned, the situations i've been in haven't worked in 27 years. My life is pretty much the same thing day in and day out. Sure I hang out with friends now and again, but more often than not it's the same thing. Wake up, sit

2008-04-20T01:01:00.001-07:00

Let me start off by saying that i'm not completely blameless in this regard, and I don't really think anyone can truly say they are, but i'm sick of all the superficial people out here in Orange County. I'm 26 years old, and have only had two real girlfriends in my life. Most of that is due to the fact that i'm shy. Less so than I used to be, but still admittedly quite shy, but that's a whole

2008-03-27T02:25:00.000-07:00

I'm gonna start this entry off on a more positive note, then kinda shift into the more personal, negative stuff. Tonight I went to my 2nd full Bad Religion concert (i've seen them 3 times live...once was part of a whole show where their set only lasted 30 minutes, so I don't consider it the same thing), and had an awesome time. Bad Religion has been doing it for 27 years, according to their

2008-02-19T22:41:00.000-08:00

As my new MySpace name says, I just don't know what to do with myself. Yesterday when I got back from my trip to Mammoth (which I may or may not write about, I haven't decided yet) I received some news that put a damper on my good mood...but first a little back story. As i've said before, i've been considering moving out to Arizona, and for the most part it's been set, just needed to find a place

2007-10-14T23:39:00.001-07:00

I don’t know. That seems to be a theme in my life as of late. I don’t know what I want to do when it comes to pretty much any serious decision. I don’t know if I want to move. I don’t know if I want to try and start a relationship with anyone out here because of the fact that I might move. I’ve considered putting up a personal ad somewhere, but if I decide to move, what’s the point? Is it

2007-09-26T00:42:00.000-07:00

I don't really know why, but lately i've really been missing Nicole. Not that it's weird to miss her, but for a while I didn't, and it just suddenly popped up again. As much as I realize it wouldn't work out between us if for some reason the opportunity to get back together were to pop up, there's still a part of me that wants it to. Her and I got along really well while we were together, but I

2007-09-17T17:19:00.001-07:00

I woke up around 10AM, lounging around the hotel room for a little while, checking my e-mail and whatnot before texting Anelle about figuring out what to do for the day. Sadie was hungry and wanted to go to some pizza place, and since I was sick of pizza, I decided i'd get lunch on my own and meet them at the mall near where Anelle lived. The GPS unit I brought was leading me all over the place

2007-09-16T09:14:00.000-07:00

So, after spending over 12 hours in various airports and planes, i'm here in my hotel in Alabama. As soon as I laned, I sent Anelle a text letting her know I was here, and she said she was on her way. I didn't know she took the day off, so I rented a car, which so far has been a bit of a waste, mainly because I had no idea she took it off. It's all good though, I got to spend pretty much all day

2007-09-12T00:29:00.001-07:00

So, my “internet” exile ended on Saturday (even though I wasn’t on much Saturday night or Sunday), and even though I felt better, and was glad I did it…I haven’t really enjoyed myself since it ended. Things have pretty much stayed the same while I was away. I’m still getting very little fulfillment out of what I used to love doing, and I can’t really say why. I don’t think I’ve outgrown it or

2007-09-04T22:11:00.001-07:00

I’ve been REALLY fucking depressed for the past week, and I can’t really figure out why. For the first time in a while, I’ve been much happier when I’m not at home. When I’m out at work, or when I’m with friends, I’m enjoying myself MUCH more than whenever I’m at home. I know some of it has to do with all the bullshit that’s gone down at the Center lately, with people leaving, and others getting

2007-08-30T00:53:00.000-07:00

This is probably going to sound bad coming after my last post, but I really need to get laid. *nod*I don't know why, but tonight I got an overwhelming sense of loneliness. Maybe it has to do with my need to get some? :pI've been wanting to start writing again, but I really have no idea what to write about. I'd like to write another story using the character I created, but I just can't think of

2007-08-27T23:51:00.001-07:00

I’m trying to remember exactly what happened with Anelle after I kissed her cheek and got no response that night. I believe I brought it up the next day while we were alone again, and she mentioned the main reason she didn’t say much is because she’s really shy. I do remember that later that night she surprised me with a kiss on the cheek, which I was naturally ecstatic about…I think that was

2007-08-06T12:55:00.001-07:00

7/28 - 7/29So far, the Gathering has been really fucking awesome, just like I knew it would be. I got in Saturday night around 8PM, and we all went to dinner (all that were there, anyway: Betty, Xylus, webhead, me, Eizan, Goro, Dez, Chax, David, Blackjak, Anelle, Lucy and Crono). Ended up splitting the dinner 12 ways...the check was something over $100. We all went back to web's place and played

2007-08-03T09:06:00.001-07:00

So i've been in Arizona since late Saturday night for the Center Gathering, and have been having an awesome time so far. Met a lot of new people that i've known for years online, and it's been great. Even met the girl i've had a crush on for the past few years. :oEveryone but her, one of my friends' roommates and I went camping yesterday, and the two of us have just been sitting around watching

2007-07-06T13:28:00.000-07:00

So, thanks to Ewa, i've come to realize what my relationship with Nicole was after all. I was just the right person at the right time, I guess is one way of putting it. I don't think when her and I started to go out that she meant for our relationship to be that way, but that's just how it worked out. I was there when she needed someone. And in some ways i'm ok with that, and some ways i'm not. I

2007-06-26T23:28:00.000-07:00

The longer I think about moving to AZ, the more it sounds like a good idea. I fucking LOVE living out here in Huntington Beach...love it. But i'm thinking a move may be just what I need. New surroundings, new people to hang out with, all that jazz. Even if Ben doesn't move, I think it could be a good thing for me. The only thing that would hold me back is not being able to find a decent job out

2007-06-20T22:47:00.000-07:00

So, I think I’ve finally cleared my head enough over the past two days to give a better rendition of what’s happened recently, without bursting into tears. :p So here goes…the beginning might be a bit jumbled, it’s mostly just the thoughts that have been going through my head, in no particular order. So, obviously I’m bummed out about what happened, I thought things were going so well, and in

2007-06-19T10:28:00.001-07:00

Well, Nicole and I are done...she still has feeling for someone she cared about that she went out with a few years ago, and they've become close again....so, we're done.It's good to know I have friends who will be there when I need them. I called Ben soon after and he came over and spent the day with me, and made it a lot easier than it would have been.

2007-06-07T12:47:00.000-07:00

So, this Sunday I’m going to be playing on a softball team for work. I haven’t played a full game of baseball/softball in years, so it should be an interesting experience. We had practice last Wednesday and I did alright. When it was my turn at bat, I made contact every time I swung, although none really got too far…but I was still happy. I still have a decent arm, I just have to make sure I don’

2007-06-06T21:05:00.000-07:00

Just a quick post, nothing of much substance anyway. I was listening to Rise Against on my way home, and a particular lyric stuck out in my head that fit my life at the moment, and it helped uplift me a tad, so I figured i'd share it with you loyal readers. :p"We've all been sorry, we've all been hurt. But how we survive is what makes us who we are." Rise Against - Survive

2007-04-28T22:51:00.000-07:00

The past 24 hours have been real good to me. Hell, this whole week has pretty much been good to me. It's about time, right?Friday night my manager let me get off work a bit early, so I left about half an hour earlier than usual and called Nicole up to let her know I was out and any time she was ready to go, so was I. I ended up heading to her place around 7PM, and then we went down to the

2007-04-26T20:50:00.000-07:00

So yesterday I had, what is quite possibly, the best day of my life. Nicole came over relatively early in the morning, and we hung out until I had to go to work. She even skipped class so she could enjoy the day more, which was nice. Oh, and before I go on, I should talk about Tuesday night. She called sometime at night (I forget exactly when) and invited me over to her place, so I went out there

2007-04-24T13:28:00.000-07:00

I really need to stop getting my hopes up so high so quickly, 90% of the time it just leads to me being depressed when things don't work out. I've been trying to get to see Nicole again for a little while now, and it seems like things just aren't working out. Not that it's her fault or my fault or anything, it just seems like everything else is to blame. I called her on Sunday night to see if she

2007-04-18T23:45:00.000-07:00

Damn it, damn it, son of a bitch. Damn it, damn it, son of a bitch.That about sums up the ending to my day. I was having a pretty good day to begin with, meeting Nicole and all, and then the drama returns in my life. More pointless bullshit that I would rather not deal with, but can't help but be caught in the middle. For those that aren't in the loop, let me summarize.I'm an admin on a message

2007-04-18T13:16:00.000-07:00

I just got back from meeting Nicole for the first time and enjoyed myself. We just walked around South Coast Plaza and talked for about half an hour, which wasn't my original plan, but I had fun just the same. I was going to treat her to lunch, but she forgot she had class at a certain time, so my plan had to change. It's all good though, I still enjoyed myself. Her and I talked on the phone last

2007-04-17T01:45:00.000-07:00

I’ve been talking to this girl I met on hotornot.com for about two weeks now, and so far it’s been going really well. We seem to get along pretty well, and so far we haven’t run out of things to talk about. We haven’t done a WHOLE lot of chatting, but I do enjoy talking with her. Her name’s Nicole, and she lives in Costa Mesa I believe. We talked a little earlier, but she had to go to class so it

2007-04-10T01:07:00.000-07:00

Even though its been awhile, this isn't going to be a huge update, so I apologize for that. :p When I opened this page, I had a better idea about what I was going to write, but TV distracted me, and I forgot.I was up late last night, like I have been for the past week, and I was just looking around a few MySpace pages of friends of mine and whatnot when I came across Johnna's. Turns out she got

2007-03-09T23:06:00.000-08:00

I've been going into Best Buy pretty much every other day for the past two weeks or so looking for the girl I mentioned a few posts back, but to no avail. Today I had to go return something, and of course, she was there. She didn't take care of my return, but she was there. I saw her, and wasn't sure at first if it was the same girl or not, so I wandered around the store a little, trying to

2007-03-08T21:31:00.000-08:00

Today has been one of those days where everyone's jumping on my case about something. I'm probably just overreacting, but it seems like everywhere I turned today, someone's had a problem with something i've said/done recently. None of them have been mean about it or anything, but its still bugging me, for unknown reasons. I've been in a bad mood all day because of it. The straw that pretty much

2007-02-21T01:13:00.000-08:00

Today was a sad day. I've been a faithful patron of the nearby EBGames for a while now, and the two people I knew in there (Rich and Ryan) that actually treated me like a person instead of a sale, quit about two weeks ago. I went in there today for the first time since they quit to pick up a pre-order for Crackdown I had, and it just wasn't the same. The two people working were just doing their

2007-01-19T21:24:00.000-08:00

Well, it's been a week sine my announcement, and things (obviously) haven't changed all that much. I do feel a lot more free about what I find sexually attractive, I don't feel like I have to look at what I normally look at behind people's backs anymore, which is a great feeling. I'm not going to be shoving it in people's faces or anything, but it's nice to know I don't have to hide it. All the

2007-01-12T00:38:00.000-08:00

Well...this has been a bit of a hard decision for me, but lately i've been thinking more and more about actually going through with this, and I think its time I admit this both to you all, and to myself. I'm bisexual.Now, maybe I should clarify things a bit. I am sexually attracted to women, but not men so much. I mean, I find men attractive, i'm not that paranoid about my sexuality, but there

2007-01-07T10:29:00.001-08:00

Well, I’m writing this from somewhere over Oregon, I presume, on my way to Seattle to visit Dana for a day. Today has been such a long day, waking up at 7AM and catching two flights late at night isn’t a good idea, for anyone that’s considering doing it. But if you’re still set on it, get plenty of rest the night before. Last night Jeremy was over, and we were gonna go get inked. We made our way

2006-12-31T22:07:00.001-08:00

Looks like i'll be ringing in the new year with the members of the most brutal metal band in the world, Dethklok! \m/

2006-12-31T21:26:00.000-08:00

So, everyone on the East coast is now in 2007, while we over here on the West are stuck in 2006 for another two and a half hours. Isn't that fascinating? -_-Anyway...i'm just sitting here alone. Not going out to get drunk (like I would get drunk anyway) , or to any parties or anything. Just gonna be at home like any other night, most likely i'll just go to bed without even realizing that its

2006-12-29T13:21:00.000-08:00

Omg ads.I know they're gonna be mostly worthless considering I get little to no readers :p but they don't really hurt things, and who knows...I might make an extra cent or two by the end of the month. So yeah, don't get too upset.I'll try to have a real update sometime in the near future....sorry.

2006-12-19T23:49:00.001-08:00

This song is a pretty good representation of what Christmas time is like to me. Now, don't get me wrong...I still love Christmas itself, but the longer I work at FedEx, the more I grow to hate the weeks leading up to Christmas. Makes me very Grinch-like...although I do enjoy buying presents for friends and family though. :) Anyway....lyrics for you!!(Deck the halls with boughs of holly

2006-12-05T23:46:00.000-08:00

God damn, almost 3 months since i've written in this thing last. I've really neglected it, haven't I? Even though I don't have regular readers or any shit like that, i'm gonna apologize anyway, like it or not. Anyway, to the meat of this update.I've mentioned Ewa's friend Anh a few times here and there, and I finally asked her out this morning, and we're going to go get dinner Sunday night.

2006-09-15T23:29:00.000-07:00

One good thing about summer winding down is that the temperatures as well are on their way down. I'm not quite ready for winter temperatures yet, but fall sounds really nice. It's been in the mid 70s down here all week, and its been nice. I think the high yesterday was around 68, and it felt like it....it's a nice, and very welcome, change of pace from the weather lately. That heat wave a few

2006-08-24T00:38:00.000-07:00

So last night, I went to my first ever Red Hot Chili Peppers concert and had a blast. It was down in San Diego, and it started around 7:30PM, but I left real early so I wouldn't get caught in any traffic. I ended up going down the 5, and decided to stop at a YMCA that was on the way, because I had been there a long time ago. Back in...98 probably, Ben, Jeremy and I went to a YMCA in Encinitas

2006-08-21T00:07:00.000-07:00

I don't know if its because i'm lonely or what, but I had some pretty evil thoughts today. I was getting onto the freeway, and in the car in front of me, some guy and his gf were in the backseat and they started making out...and the first thought that popped into my head was, "I want to slam into the back of their car. " It looked like they were still doing it when I passed by them about 30

2006-08-17T00:40:00.000-07:00

Another song with lyrics that I feel fit my life at the moment...at least for one person in particular.

2006-08-03T01:29:00.000-07:00

Went out to the beach on Saturday with Ben and a majority of his family. Had a good, relaxing day out there. Got the day off a few weeks ago and was looking forward to it. Didn't get down to the water, but wasn't really looking to, to be honest. I just relaxed and enjoyed not being at work. I got there around noon, and it was just Ben, his dad, his brothers Danny and Rob, and his cousin (I think

2006-07-26T23:13:00.000-07:00

Yeah, yeah...another cop-out blog post. But I don't really care right now. This song fits with how I feel at this point in time.Roadside, by Rise Against off of the album The Sufferer And The WitnessTell me what I'm supposed to do, With all these left over feelings of you; 'Cause I don't know And tell me how I'm supposed to feel, When all these nightmares become real; 'Cause I don't know

2006-07-17T03:28:00.000-07:00

Two posts from me in one day? You lucky bastards! <_

2006-07-17T02:08:00.000-07:00

For those that care, the situation that resulted in me posting the lyrics has been settled, so...yeah. Rejoice, or something. :)On a related note, the person it was about and I have become good friends, and i've considered going out to meet her...dunno when I actually will or if I really will for sure...but i'm thinking about it. Yeah...And on an unrelated note, when I was in AZ, everyone out

2006-07-14T22:12:00.000-07:00

I keep telling myself I won't do this again, but here I am, doing it again. Deal with it, I guess. The following song relates to my life at the moment.I'm not doing great I feel like I'm dead Not thinking straight Inside my body, troubled, full of hate I had to let it out before it's too late Deep Inside It can hide! Feeling so lost and betrayed why does this happen to me everytime Stuck in this

2006-06-01T22:44:00.000-07:00

Ugh.Okay, I think I mentioned in my last post that i'm planning on heading back out to AZ on the 11th. Since then, the other two people that were going to go have both decided not to. One because things didn't go his way, which in my opinion is a bullshit reason. But i'm not going to hold it against him, I know that's how he is, and I can't say I didn't expect it to happen. Still sucks, though.

2006-05-06T23:05:00.000-07:00

Damn, almost a month without updating...my bad, yo. Life has been pretty much the same as it always has, no real huge events to update on. I went out with Jen a while back and had a good time, but I don't really think I want anything more than a friendship with her. I just get this weird feeling from her, I guess it's just the fact that we don't seem to "click." I enjoy talking with her, but

2006-04-07T23:33:00.000-07:00

Well, its not looking as if Jen and I are gonna be doing anything together this weekend, sadly. I gotta say i'm anxious to go out with her, just to see how well we get along outside of work, and maybe to ease my "fears" so to speak. There's still a chance, but i'm not betting on it (going out this weekend I mean). I'm thinking of just going along with her off the clock on the late shuttle one

2006-04-05T01:26:00.000-07:00

So, it turns out the woman at the ramp in Long Beach wasn't just joking around after all. Jen actually came up to me while we were at the ramp, and she handed me a piece of paper with her cell phone number and her e-mail address. I e-mailed her tonight, but wasn't really sure what to say, so I kinda rambled, probably coming off like an idiot, but oh well.While I was in my truck scanning the

2006-04-01T23:20:00.000-08:00

God, this week seemed like it went on so long. Work wasn't overly tiresome, but for some reason, each day this week when I got home I was exhausted. Thursday and Friday were surprisingly light, I was done with my route by 4:30PM, which pretty much NEVER happens. Yesterday I ended up staying about two hours longer than usual, which wasn't too bad. Today was another long day, because the other guy

2006-03-29T01:25:00.000-08:00

So, the Jen girl I mentioned last week is on vacation this week, which is both a good and a bad thing. Good, because hopefully I won't have to hear about it from the girl up at Long Beach all week. She didn't bring it up today, and I just hope it keeps up the rest of the week, but i'm not betting on it. Bad, because since she's one of our shuttle drivers, the rest of us have to pick up the slack.

2006-03-23T00:07:00.000-08:00

The past few days up at the Long Beach airport at work, one of the people I work with has been scheming to get me hooked up with one of the shuttle drivers at my station, but i've made it pretty obvious without outright saying it that i'm not interested. At first it was kinda funny, but now...four days later, its getting a bit annoying. I don't really know what sort of talk she's been passing

2006-03-15T22:19:00.000-08:00

Okay, time to go on a video game nerd rant. Stick with me, people!Alright, rewind back to two weeks ago, when I pre-ordered the re-release of Metal Gear Solid 3. Konami (the company that produces the game) was giving consumers two versions to choose from. A regular edition, and a limited edition, which included two extra discs. One you were supposed to get when you pre-ordered the limited edition

2006-03-12T23:15:00.000-08:00

Lately I find myself with no incentive to stay up late anymore. I've been going to bed around midnight (which is early for me) more often than not. I don't know what I expect to happen, but I get extremely bored by around 11PM, and just decide instead of staying up and doing nothing, to go to bed instead. Yeah...

2006-02-27T20:26:00.000-08:00

The title of my other blog on this site is so fitting, i'm considering moving it over to this one...but then again this one fits really well as well. Decisions, decisions.Once again thoughts of Johnna are floating around in my mind, once again spawned by new pictures of her up on her myspace account. I know this time, because she updated her blog there, and I saw she had a new picture as her

2006-02-20T22:47:00.000-08:00

Lately i've been once again thinking about moving out to Arizona. I figure I can get a job at a FedEx station out there somewhere, that way I won't lose my seniority or anything like that, and I can probably keep a comparable pay rate. I don't know where exactly i'd live out there, probably somewhere near Tempe or Phoenix (mainly because there's stations nearby). The only problem is I don't

2006-02-18T12:58:00.000-08:00

Haven't posted one of these in a long ass time, my apologies. Not like anyone reads these outside of Dana anyway. :pLife has been decent lately, but its leaning more towards the less decent side. I made it through Valentine's Day alright, I pretty much just ignored it and went about it like any other day. I don't get all worked up about Valentine's Day anyway, probably because I've never had

2006-02-06T21:52:00.000-08:00

Why can I not look at Johnna's profile without getting heartbroken? No matter how much I tell myself nothing's gonna happen between the two of us again, I find myself unable to believe it. I'm pretty positive i'm right, but for some reason there's the part of my mind that just won't accept it, no matter how well thought out anything I have going through my mind might be. I just can't help it...

2006-02-03T22:04:00.000-08:00

Had a bit of a scare last night. I was downstairs listening to music, when my mom came downstairs, telling me that she called 911, and that Grandma wasn't feeling well. She needed me to let the EMTs and firemen in, so I opened up the garage door and waited outside for them to arrive. I led them upstairs where my mom and grandma were, and they asked grandma a few questions before helping her

2006-01-31T21:26:00.000-08:00

I don't know what exactly it is about my life lately, but this whole year so far has been pretty much one huge down note. The only real bright side to it so far was going out to AZ, and going snowboarding last Monday. I hate where I am in life right now. I absolutely despise my job, but unfortunately i'm stuck there, considering I don't have any other job opportunities at his point in time, nor

2006-01-26T23:19:00.000-08:00

So here I am, in Arizona for the first time. Well, not really the first time, if you count layovers in the airport. But yeah, i'm here. I left around noon, and got here a little after 6PM California time. The drive actually wasn't that bad at all. I had enough stuff on my iPod to keep myself entertained, so it seemed to go a lot faster than I thought it would. After I got my stuff brought into

2006-01-16T02:30:00.000-08:00

Decided to try something slightly different. Don't know what exactly caused this idea, but here we go.http://www.dbzcenter.com/~mt/vblog.zip

2006-01-09T22:35:00.000-08:00

I just had quite possibly the best Guitar Hero session i've ever had. I was just playing tonight to enjoy myself, not to get a high score or anything like that, and even still I did good. I beat Bark At The Moon on Hard, which I hadn't been able to do before. I got SO close to finishing Cowboys from Hell, but I only got 96% through the song. But its okay, defeating BATM was good enough for me.

2006-01-08T17:47:00.000-08:00

I'll get to my "fabulous" Vegas trip later (don't let the quotes fool you, I did have a good time), but right now I want to talk about something that's been on my mind ever since Dana and I broke up, and even a little before then. I made another pst about Johnna a while back, and I'd like to add onto it. Ever since her and I stopped seeing each other so long ago, i've found myself unable to stop

2006-01-06T10:54:00.000-08:00

I forgot to mention...I think from now on, i'd like to be called Daniel instead of just Dan.*nod*

2006-01-06T01:54:00.000-08:00

When I decided I was gonna update my blog for today, this wasn't the update I had in mind, but recent events have caused me to change it, at least the beginning. Maybe i'll get to my originally planned update, but for now, here goes.I was watching this comedian, Tom Papa, on Conan tonight, and he mentioned something about getting older, and for some reason it stirred up old thoughts about dying

2006-01-03T21:47:00.000-08:00

So, last night was awesome. Originally, the plan was to just hang out with Ben, Ewa, and my two gradeschool friends who now live out of town, Ramon and Jeremy. They were both in town for the holidays, and were leaving this week. We were gonna go down to Dave & Busters and just chill. It turns out, after getting in touch with Ramon, we found out he was getting together with another gradeschool

2006-01-02T00:14:00.000-08:00

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!God, I hate it SO much when i'm playing a game, that I know I can beat, that i've handled with no problems before, and I just can't for some reason. Like today, I couldn't play Guitar Hero to save my LIFE. Songs i'd easily beaten on Expert level before, I was failing tonight. I don't know why either...I just don't know what the fuck went wrong. It bugs

2006-01-01T17:13:00.000-08:00

So, New Years was a rather pleasant night after all. Around 7:30PM I went over to Ewa's house and from there we left to her friends' place down in Newport Beach, and were probably no more than 20ft away from the beach, which was nice. Her friend Susan had everything set up on the table, snacks, party hats, and whatnot. We started watching The Exorcism of Emily Rose, which I was too scared to

2005-12-30T23:44:00.000-08:00

God, am I glad Christmas time is over. It is quite possibly the WORST time of year to work for a major shipping company like FedEx. The volume gets so heavy, and the last two weeks leading up to Christmas are the worst. I've survived another one though...I think this would be my...third? Anyway, it feels great to know the worst is over. This week has been pretty easy, thankfully. And tomorrow

2005-12-16T22:39:00.000-08:00

I am an IDIOT.I had one thing to do today for Dana, and that was get a flight booked for her dog, and of course, me being a moron, didn't do it until it was too late. The one thing she asks me to do and I fuck it up...I hate myself for making that mistake, I can only imagine how much she's mad at me. That dog is her life, and she wanted so desperately for him to be with her on Christmas, and I'm

2005-12-09T21:26:00.000-08:00

Not really a personal update, but its something I took a lot of time to write out, so i'm gonna post it here too. It was posted at a message board, so ignore any references to a "Xylus."1: Attack – Like Xylus mentioned, this song starts off the album much the way “Prison Song” started off Toxicity, with a bang. Daron and Serj harmonize so well, which is evident throughout the whole album. “We

2005-11-29T12:29:00.000-08:00

Blasted feelings...I found my ex, Johnna on MySpace the other day, and today when I went to my home page, looking to see if there were any new comments or anything, I saw her picture on my "Top 8" friends list thing. And my eyes started to well up just a little. I'm fighting it right now cause Ben's right next to me, and I don't want him asking about it.Dana asked me a few times if I still loved

2005-11-17T23:00:00.000-08:00

Haven't posted in this thing forever. No reason, really...just haven't. There's really not a lot to report on, either. Dana's got her own place in Santa Ana now, which is about 20 minutes away. I see her like every other day. Tomorrow will be our 6 month anniversary. Go us! I'm gonna take her out to dinner tomorrow, maybe a movie...but since it falls on a Friday, I can't be out too late. :(Bought

2005-10-12T12:07:00.000-07:00

Dag blast it, Dana got me sick. :( Not what I wanted to be on my vacation...but i'm still enjoying my time off. Dana and I went out again yesterday to look for more jobs, and she applied at JC Penney's, and she got a job! She's off training right now, and hopefully things are going well. Now all we need to do is start actually going to a few of the places she has in mind for potential roommates.

2005-10-09T01:24:00.000-07:00

Good fucking God, can Green Day put on a good show. We (Ben, Ewa, her friend Ahn and I) saw them last year, and even though the set list was practically the same, I still had a complete blast. One of the best concerts i've ever been to. The only downside about this concert was that it was outdoors, because it was pretty chilly, and I was just wearing one shirt. Had I known it'd be outside, i'd

2005-09-28T22:31:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the lack of updates as of late, life hasn't been all that exciting lately. Work's been the same as usual, except Quiksilver is starting to get busier once again, which sucks because this week it's been pretty hot. Last Saturday I got to come in late, around 12PM, and work until around 5. It was nice being able to sleep in for once on a Saturday. Work was pretty tolerable that day too.

2005-09-21T00:28:00.000-07:00

So yeah, I went up to see Dana this weekend, and things went well. We're still friends, we just hung out basically, didn't do a whole lot. I asked my manager on Friday if I could possibly get out of work a little early on Saturday so I wouldn't have to worry about missing my flight, and things were looking okay until about 2:30PM when I got a bunch of oncalls and had to stay a half hour later

2005-09-14T03:08:00.000-07:00

Don't get the wrong idea from that last post, I haven't made up my mind one way or the other if Dana and I will give it another shot. I still think waiting to see how things work out in the future is the best way to go about things, even though there's that side of me that wants to just be with her again. I don't think its strong enough to take over just yet, but there's no real way of knowing

2005-09-12T23:24:00.000-07:00

So, i'm going up to Colorado to see Dana this weekend. I had bought tickets to go up there and surprise her for our 4th month anniversary...and when I think about it, buying those tickets might've helped fuel the fire of me not being able to afford living on my own (with Dana, I mean). Money had been tight for a while, and with the money I spent to fly out there, rent a car, AND get a hotel just

2005-09-09T23:09:00.000-07:00

Now i'm back in the mindset that i'm better off without her. I don't want to lose her as part of my life, but Dana's got a bit of growing up to do....and until that day comes, I don't think I can get back together with her, much as the thought of being alone scares me. I know i've got my friends and family, so i'm not truly alone...but for me, having someone outside of family tell me that they

2005-09-07T22:29:00.000-07:00

God, i'm so confused right now. The more I think about Dana, the more I miss her. The more I miss her, the more I want to forgive and forget and just get back with her. There's part of me that wants to, and there's part of me that doesn't. The part that does...I dunno, I can't tell if I really do want her back, or if i'm just saying I do so I won't feel lonely. When her and I were together, I was

2005-09-05T22:43:00.000-07:00

I'm not really going to go into EVERY single detail of what happened between Dana and I, but I will just sorta run through the events. Basically, as most of you that read my old blog know, Dana and I were set to try and move in together in the first few weeks of October. She'd come down on the 5th, and we'd spend the next week looking at apartments. Well, to be completely honest, I wasn't really

Newness

2005-09-05T17:47:00.000-07:00

So this is where i'm gonna be blogging from now on. I don't want Dana reading my thoughts anymore, because I know she'll just bitch at me for it.